This is a topic that everyone can relate to, we have all lost someone in our lives, and generally speaking it hurts like hell, they all say time is a healer, its not really its a diverter, but until you loose someone really close, this fact is not apparent, its easy to say to some one, in time it will feel better, and I am sorry and although as comforting as that is at the time. It really means nothing as time goes by, I am not saying that you cry everyday, all day from here to eternity, because again this doesnt happen life does go on and time takes its toll, you get up and do what you have to everyday, but somedays something triggers that memory, sometimes something really stupid and it feels like the loss was yesterday and you are right back where you started, crying for a time, not a long time but enough to know that pain is still as raw as it was in the beginning. Stupid thing is in time you know that it will change nothing, you know it wont bring them back, you know people feel that this should not happen now its been a while, you should be feeling better now even able to handle that emotion that for some reason came from nowhere and ended up making you sob for even the briefest moment. But having been there on a few occasions over the last couple of years, knowing that most days I can talk about my father and generally re-cap parts of his and my life without breaking down, I still have the odd days that for no reason take me by complete suprise and I end up in tears.
You see my father died on July 1st 2005, he knew of course that his time was coming to an end and even asked for a birthday party on June 27th, which little known by me he had managed to get round everyone who attended with little one to one chats about caring for each other and looking out for me etc, you see my dad was one of those guys, and I am sure i am right in saying that many dads are the same, he had this view that he could not go anywhere without making sure all was well first, so to be honest to hear that this was done was really no suprise, to say I mis him is lame really there are no words to explain this feeling missing him is an understatement, my dad bought me up, my mother left when I was 9 and he was all I had, when I left home at 16 he followed me to Hastings, always living within the same area as me, always there when I needed him, sitting in on sports days, sorting the kids with their swimming helping to get them dry, watching all the Christmas plays and carols, with me, babysitting at the drop of a hat whenever I needed him it was never a chore he did all this right up until the end. He was ill for quite some time with various ailments all chest related and generally he felt down to being stupid enough to start smoking, which he did give up about 7 years before he died but as he said to little to late. he made the girls promise never to even start my daughter is so convinced he is behind the no smoking date as that is his anniversary, she says he always said that if he could he would make sure she did not start.
This Blog today is dedicated to my Dad
Herbert David Booth, 27/06/1927 - 01/07/2005
beloved father, brother and friend to many, missed by all
if you have a dedication that you would like to share, or memories good or bad that you would like to put on the web feel free to add yours here